Attack of the eyelash

Brian's weakness is Eyeballs. If you touch his eye, touch your own eye, talk about touching your eye he freaks out. In the new Alice in Wonderland movie, a mouse pokes out a monsters eye and Brian about had a heart attack. If you mention the words eye doctor he gets queasy and has to sit down because he becomes light headed. So this morning when an eyelash decided to fall into Brian's eye and hold on for dear life, I was a little worried for his safety. At first he said it was no big deal but after a while I knew this was a life or death situation! I coaxed him to look at me so I could find where the culprit was hiding out. Lucky for us it was just in the corner of his eye. Bad for us, Brian couldn't stop blinking and squirming and the eyelash kept roaming about his eyeball cavity. I told him it would be simple for me to just reach up and touch the corner of his eye where the eyelash was and pull it out of his eye. This was not smart because I mentioned "touching" and "eye" in the same sentence and he had to lay down to try and calm his nerves. So I decided to take matters into my own hands. While he was laying down I made a sneak attack and sat on his chest and pinned his arms under my knees. I had to brace his head with my left arm and use my left hand as a clamp to hold his head still, while I pried his eyelid open with my left fingertips. With my right hand I used a Q-tip and calmly dabbed the corner of his eye where the eyelash was clinging to his eyeball, and with great success removed the retched beast from his eye. Brian had to see the culprit for himself and scolded the eyelash for landing in his eyeball. He then decided, after 5 minutes of deep breathing, the smartest move would be to shave off his remaining eyelashes so this would never happen again. Luckily he was too exhausted from the whole ordeal to go through with his plan.